Many a good truth has been upheld by wicked men for their own purposes. And good men have caused much wickedness in their zealotry."
"The Armleder."
Dietrich hesitated. "That was one such case. There were good men among them." He fell silent thinking of the fishwife and her boy in the Frieburg market.
"There was a leader among the Armleder," Joachim said slowly, "called 'Angelus' "
Dietrich was a long time silent, "that man is dead now," he said at last. "But through him I learned a terrible truth: that heresy is truth in extremis. The proper object of the eye is light, but too much light blinds the eye."
"So, you would compromise with the wicked, as the Convectuals do?"
"Jesus said the weeds would grow with the wheat until the Judgment," Dietrich answered," so one finds both good men and bad in the Church. By our fruits we will be known, not by what name we have called ourselves. I have come to believe that there is more grace in becoming wheat than there is in pulling weeds."
"So might a weed say, had it speech," said Joachim. "You split hairs."
"Better to split hairs than the heads beneath them."
~ Michael Flynn, Eifelheim
*Matthew 13:24-30
Prison is an especially tough place to hear about a crisis in the family. Most of our support network, if we are blessed with one at all, is beyond these walls and we are left with sinking news to grieve alone.My friend, Cameron, has had a crushing week so far. First came news on Monday that his ex-girl-friend, who hadn't written in months, was victim to an abusive relationship that hospitalized her for some time. The girl's older brother was a childhood friend of mine, so Cameron came me as a shoulder to dry on and share his grief with.
I got the girl's address and wrote her an encouraging letter, but I also did my best to brighten up Cameron.
My efforts were dashed today, just two days later, when Cameron found out his grandmother had passed away right after his address was cleared for parole. So close to getting out to see her, but it didn't work out that way. Cameron's boss caught me in the hallway and, knowing how close we are, shared the news.
"Keep and eye on him" was my missive, a very decent gesture by his boss.
I found Cameron in the library and pulled him out into a side hallway so he would be away form other people and more free to grieve. As we stood in the hallway, the supply officer came by and asked what we were doing.
" Grieving," I replied.
"Well, go grieve somewhere else" came her brusque instructions.
Like I said, prison is a tough place for a crisis. I'll try to be open and available for Cameron as he works through this time, but I know I'm not any kind of replacement for his home and family.
Prison being what it is, there are many shenanigans going on nearly every day. Usually they don't have any consequences for me, because I'm never involved. However, there are instances when the craziness gets so out of hand that it affects a mass of inmates. One of those instances occurred tonight.
The guard for our dorm came in to do a cell search. The guys in the cell to be searched had a bunch of tobacco and started flushing what they could with the door closed. The guard rushed upstairs and called to get the cell door opened pronto.
When the door popped open, one of the guys tossed a bag over the rail to a guy on the ground floor, who ran to his cell, shut the door and started flushing. As the bag flew over the rail, the guard ran down the stairs to the newly closed door and called to get it opened. Behind the shouting, I heard the high-powered flushes of our toilets. When the door opened, the guy was just standing there with a smile on his face.
After this humiliation, the guard called rank. Everyone in the dorm was marched into the hallway and strip-searched. We all waited in the hall while a squad of officers tore apart our dorm, tossing stuff all over our cells. About thirty minutes passed before we were allowed to go back in. Even then, we went straight to our destroyed cells and were told that we would be locked down for the rest of the night.
The stupidest part is that because none of the tobacco was captured, the guys won't get in trouble and they will stay in the dorm to repeat their actions.
Dietrich reached into his scrip and pulled out the wooden doll and gave it to their little girl. He had polished it to remove the scorches, and had replaced the charred arms and legs with fresh sticks he had found. The hair, he had cut from his own head. But Maria dropped the doll in to the dirt and cried, "That isn't Anna!. That isn't Anna!" And she ran in side the rebuilt cottage, leaving Dietrich crouching in the dust.
Sighing, he replaced the doll into his scrip. It wasn't the doll, he thought. The doll was only a construction of sticks and rags. There was nothing precious about such things. He stood and picked up the wooden cage with the clucking chickens...
Something repaired, he thought as he returned to the parsonage, is never quite what it was before. Whatever parts were replaced, the memories could never be.
~ Michael Flynn, Eifelheim
Before I came to prison I played board games once a week with a group in Arlington that was led by a really cool middle-aged couple. That was always a highlight for my week and they exposed me to a slew of different games, mostly the new wave of designer board games from Europe. The most successful is Settlers of Catan, if that helps give you an idea of the type of game.The board game group is one thing I have really missed since my arrest. Fortunately, the couple has kept in touch via letters and their annual prediction contest. A year or so ago they told me about a game that had been addictive for everyone they shared with. This game - Dominion - is so loved by one of their relatives that close to 100 games were played during a holiday gathering.
I told West about Dominion a few months ago when he asked about games without dice that we could play at rec. Now with cards approved, West has just received Dominion from his mom and I've got to say - it's pretty awesome. It plays fast and lets you approach a win with a variety of strategies, although, if too many people pursue one strategy, they choke each other out. It's not quite the typical board game night, but we still have a lot of fun.
Yet another change of staff in the library. West out, Shane in.
West has been on the unit for six years and, unfortunately, has gathered a couple grudges in the administration. One of the guys in classification - the department that does job changes - saw West working in the library and immediately went to the major to complain. Not even an hour later West had a job change in the TDC computer. One of the lieutenants saw him in the hall and threatened to lock him up in segregation if he was in the library. All of this and he had not done anything wrong in the library. It's just the vindictive people working here.
So now my buddy Shane is working with me. He's not official yet, but it should be moving through the proper channels soon. It's cool to be working alongside such a good friend. The job ought to be at least a little more enjoyable.
More good news for the library: we have a Half Price Books hook-up.
On Thursdays I get off work just as the Bible study is starting so I often see the visitors as they come in to lead the class. One of the volunteers, a bear of a man named Rick, brought a box full of books from home a few weeks ago that he gave to the library. So the Thursday crew has already blessed us once.
Tonight we had an uncommon visitor. Katie is a missionary who is currently living stateside and is full of spunk and, like others in the crew, has a passion for sharing the Christ-life. When I showed up for class she greeted me and asked if I worked in the library. After my affirmative answer, she asked if she could donate books. After another affirmative, I got to hear a cool story.
A few years ago, Katie was trying to start a library in Kenya. She went to a Half Price bookstore and asked if they had any books they needed to get rid of. The clerk replied that the store did not have unused inventory, but she could check their warehouse in Dallas. Upon inquiry, the warehouse attendant said that, as long as Katie had proof of 501.3 (c) status, she could get whatever she wanted. Needless to say, the Kenyan library was a success. And now Katie wants to share the blessing with our library.
I might need some help picking up the books," Katie remarked.
"I know someone who would probably love to meet you and get the books," I replied and gave her my mom's contact info. "She even has a list of suggestions to help out."
What a boon it would be to have more free books for our decrepit-yet-slowly-progressing library.
OJ is back.
After weeks of negotiations with the major and warden about moving back to R-pad, it finally went through. It took some gathering of allies on the pod, but it did happen. Omar and I even put together a celebratory meal to welcome him back. Prison pizza followed by a couple of good games of Munchkin is hard to beat for a good time around here.
Lelan also came back last night and was at work this morning. I got to hear about his vacation during our lunch break. He had a personal meeting with the parole folks, too, a conversation just long enough to require a leave from the unit. He would have been back sooner, but somehow got lost in the system during transit. If that isn't a scary anecdote from prison - escape, lost parole, injury - and no one would know anything because the person isn't in the system. I can think of one good way to cut down that problem. Bookkeeping is easier with less to keep track of, so, let many of us go, especially those of us with technical probation or parole violations. We were sent here because we were, at most, a headache for our probation officer, not because we were a threat to society.
