One of the world's biggest music festivals has been going on all week long a three hour's drive from here, south to Austin. SXSW - or South by Southwest - takes over downtown Austin as every club is booked with big names and (more often) no-names trying to break out. But the venues aren't the only places to hear new music; the sidewalks and parks are often strewn with impromptu gigs and jam sessions. Since I hit that age in my teenage years where music becomes more than just words and sounds, I have wanted to go to this panoply of bands and experience the "festival of festivals."
I still haven't been able to go myself, bu today on a local public music station (KXT 91.7) I was able to hear at least a part of it. KXT has a show on Fridays called the Texas Mix, which showcases artists from this state, old and new. Today, instead of playing their usual variety of Texas music, they played a concert from SXSW by Spoon, a great band from Austin.
Spoon is one of my favorite bands, playing a kind of starkly minimal pop rock. I've been listening to them since my senior year of high school, but have never been to one of their shows. Since my incarceration, I've really missed their music, and, while KXT plays their songs now and then, I wish I could just pop in one of their albums and listen straight through.
Luckily, that is just what it sounded like when KXT played Spoon's show. Most of the songs were from their newest album released this year, but a few older songs made it, too. I was bobbing my head to the tunes when a friend came in to tell me it was time to go back to work. Too bad. I was enjoying a festival I've never been to and a band I wanted to listen to and had to leave them both. I guess I'll get another chance later.
Since I started working in the library, I haven't been able to go to rec, except on the weekends. To fill the gaps, I've been doing a 10-15 minute yoga routine in my cell each day. Though I do feel uber-limbo afterward, the yoga isn't doing much for my strength or running ability. Plus, my cellie gives me weird looks that say, "This guy needs some help. Now."To try to get back on track, I asked Ereman if he wouldn't mind my absence on the mornings that late rec (9:00-10:30) is available. When he said it would be alright, I asked my boss and she said go ahead. Great, I'm back. It's only two or three times a week, but it's better than where I was.
My old pair of sneakers have become nearly irreparable after two years of hard use, so I also put in for permission to buy new ones. For any major purchase (sneakers, radio, electric kettle, fan, etc.), we have to wait for approval from the property officer before our purchase. My request was approved two days ago, so I got the new pair early this morning from commissary. The shoes are Riddell basketball shoes that cost a relatively cheap $32. They're not great, but they're much better than slip-ons or boots. Now it's time to put them to use.
Today was the beginning of a three-day long audit by the American Corrections Association (ACA). This group's accreditation is necessary for better funding and , though we are already accredited, we must be audited every three years. I have no doubt that this place will pass, but the administration is freaking, regardless.
They are worried about stuff that isn't even a part of a well-run unit. For the past few weeks, the paint crew has gone into overdrive. Walls, trim, doors, and new murals have been painted, which has probably created a hazardous place to live due to the fumes. There was nothing wrong with the most of the paint anyway. What's funny is seeing guys with the blue accents on their white uniforms from absentmindedly leaning against wet paint.
Even my boss has been stressing out. We've been told that the auditors will come in to ask questions and look at records. My boss has only been on the job since January and she hates to talk in front of people.
Today, when the auditors came in with the unit major, she froze up. As the questions came, she hesitantly answered. Seeing her fear, the major tried to help with the answers. One of the auditors' questions was about Spanish books, so I pointed out our small collection. From then on, the auditors directed their questions toward me. I wasn't sure if I should answer directly or defer to my boss, but the major gave me a silent nod as a go ahead. With his approval, I went on to answer more questions. The library audit took about ten minutes total before the auditors said thanks and moved on.
I was told this evening by a friend who works under the unit ACA coordinator that the library did well. Now my boss can stop the worrying. After two more days, I'm sure the whole administration will relax a bit.
"You're a jerk!"
These words were directed at me and came form the mouth of my boss in the library today. They surprised me and may surprise you, too.
My coworker, Ereman, and my boss often talk about people behind their backs and spend much of the time when the library is empty spinning gossip. There's another guy that often stops by to trade his share, too. This guy is always commenting that I am always quiet and reading.
"You sure like to read, don't you?" is his usual question.
Yes, much more than talking about people badly.
Anyway, the three others in the library were doing their usual "gos-swap" and labeling certain guys as stalkers. My boss is a young blond that many guys find attractive, so in this environment there are some that come to the library to get a good look. Ereman calls these guys stalkers and is quite liberal with the use of the label. He's probably on target with some of these, but he extends the label to guys with poor social skills who just come off as weirdos.
I don't think it's our place to judge these guys, especially so superficially. One of the "stallions" comes by each morning to poke his head in the door and greet us. When he actually comes in the library, he asks Ereman or me for a recommendation, grabs a book, and leaves. Yesterday he came straight form work without a pass. Because he had to go get a pass to come in, he awkwardly joked to my boss that he should have a permanent pass.
This led to my boss labeling him a stalker, which led to me defending him and others, which led to the opening exclamation of this entry. She got mad at me for defending someone who wan;t there to defend himself. When asked why, I explained that they were wrong about the guy and that they were judging quite a few people harshly without understanding everything. That's part of why I'm here: people not understanding the situation fully. It upsets me to see it so often and so blatantly, even though I do it myself in my head. That doesn't mean it needs to be spoken or projected onto so many. Ereman's reasoning that it protects our boss isn't quite valid. It makes this place more threatening than it needs to be.
* Matthew 7:1
My desk has been painted and protected by a sheet for over a week now. I've received some puzzled looks from Juan, but I try to reassure him that it will be finished soon. The reason I've been waiting is because I don't want to ruin the paint before I apply the wax coat.
The wax arrived today. I was a bit disappointed by the small amount, but at least it is a start. I was able to apply three thin coats with the little bit I had. I'll be adding to it until I have a glossy sheen on top. I figure if I do a job, it ought to be done well. I just have to be patient for things to be completed in here. No Home Depot available; everything is improvised. It's pretty amazing what some people have cobbled together in here. I'm a "short-timer" though, so I don't have as many cool tricks. And really, I don't want many of them.
My mom has been sending me brain teasers each week. For a long time she would send the problem on a Bloom County postcard and follow it later in the week with the answer on a sushi postcard. It's been really cool to not only exercise my noggin, but also collect some interesting postcards.I guess she has run out of sushi and Opus because a new series has started coming. The first one I received had me bundled up in laughter and I can't wait to get more. It featured a rabbit using a trampoline to hop through a helicopter's spinning blades. Flipping the card over, I saw the card is form the aptly named collection "Suicide Bunnies - 'little bunnies who just don't want to live anymore.' " Believe me, you have to see them to understand. But don't take my word for it; they are also endorsed by Elton John* and Hugh Grant**.
* "It’s the funniest, bunniest book I’ve ever read!"
** "Brilliantly researched—one of the most important books of the year."
I knew that since Alan had left an open bunk in my cell, I would be getting acquainted with a new cellmate soon. This unit, like most in the overcrowded Texas prison system, doesn't like to keep open bunks long. However, just like when I moved in, I had to wait to see who my new cellie would be. This time I was the one at work all day. It wasn't until I got back form Bible study in the evening that I found out who had moved in.
Juan is a Mexican national who came to live in Austin with his eight (!) brothers. He doesn't speak much English, so communication is not easy. I don't have much Spanish vocabulary under my command, even after my stint with a Mexican cellmate at my last unit. Juan was happy to have a white cellie because he said "blacks are too loud and dirty". Hmm...ooooookay.
I don't know how things will shake out, but it doesn't seem like Juan will be a bad guy to share space with. And really that's the only mandatory for a cellie. It would be nice to have a good relationship but it is not necessary. There are too many wackos in prison to ask for much more than a decent (by prison standards) guy.
Last week my close friend and cellmate, Alan,
found out he had made parole. Hallelujah! I know he is anxious to get home to his family, especially his kids. He genuinely wants a righteous life for himself and to be good example for his kids. He's been nervous all week, but he is excited and ready to get out of here.
Almost from day one when I moved into the cell we hit it off. We formed a friendship based on Christ, often praying for each others' hardships. It has been nice to be able to have a cellmate with whom I confide in and talk about all kinds of issues - mundane or complex. I don't know how much of an encouragement I've been to him, but Alan is often able, on those few down days, to lift me up in a short time.
There are not many people here that I just click with, but Alan has been one of those people.
He left this morning to be released later this week from Huntsville, down near Houston. I don't know who will replace him in my cell, but I pray it will be someone I can share life with in a similar way. I wish Alan the fortitude to say "yes" to the things he needs to be involved in and "no" to those he must avoid. I hope to never be his cellmate again, no matter how great it is to have him around.
"Are you ready to leave?'
In the library I was shelving books. The question came from my boss and was directed at a guy standing by the check out table.
"No, I'm not ready to leave. I'm waiting to check out these books.
"You can holler at either one of us when you get ready," said my co-worker, who was also shelving and rearranging books.
"No," the guy said as he turned with a scowl, "One of y'all needs to be behind this table all the time to work."
Hearing voices escalating, I moved to the table to hurry this guy out the door before things got crazy.
"Man, we have work outside that table, too," retorted my co-worker, getting louder.
"You'll check out my books first."
"STOP!" exclaimed my boss. "STOP IT GUYS. NOW!"
"Shut up your worker's smart mouth first," mumbled the angry customer under his breath.
I quickly and calmly checked out the books and showed the guy out the door, hoping that he and my co-worker would not cross paths soon. For the first time in a while the library was dead silent.
Since starting the job in the library I have tried to fit work into my existing schedule instead of working my schedule around the job. This has not served me well in the sleep department. I have to be at work at 7 AM so I wake up at 6 AM to get in some reading and quiet time before heading out. This wouldn't be a problem except that Alan and I stay up talking till 11:30 most nights and I usually read for a while afterwards. I don't know why it's so hard to maintain six hours of sleep after doing it almost all the time before I was incarcerated. The lack of sleep is definitely taking its toll, though.
This morning I woke up at 6 to fit in quiet time before a quick haircut, then work. The haircut took longer than I expected and I didn't hurry out until 7:30. When I reached the library the door was locked and the lights were out. I thought it was strange, so I went to my coworker's dorm to see if he knew what was going on. I reached his cell door and saw him dead asleep. I knocked on the door to waken him and asked if he knew when our boss was coming in.
"Dude, it's Thursday," came the groggy voice.
Thursday is our late day in the library. We don't open up until 10 AM. Oops.
"My bad. Go back to sleep, bro."
Now my lack of sleep is causing others lack of sleep. I'm going to need to start napping after work to recharge just a bit. I can't have my head unscrewed like this.
