I've had a hard time getting to sleep the past few days. Each time I lie down or close my eyes I see a guy dangling from the ceiling or twitching violently on the floor. I haven't had any bad dreams, thankfully.

It's hard to get the suicide attempt off my mind with all this empty time on my hands. I wish it hadn't happened at all, but I especially wish it hadn't happened on lockdown. There's not anything going on to take my mind off the guy and I haven't been able to talk to the chaplain yet to work through stuff. All I've done is pray and read. I don't even feel like writing home or to anyone else right now.

I just want to stop reliving it.