When I moved into this dorm I waited to see if they had a prayer group like some other places I've been. The first night I didn't see anything so I asked one of the guys about it. He said no, they haven't had a prayer group at all. So I told him I would start one tonight.
I was a little nervous because, from what I've seen so far, the guys in this dorm are ready to fight over anything and probably have the worst attitudes and behaviors of any other dorm I've been in. I didn't know what to expect.
I certainly wasn't expecting six other guys to join me in the corner when I called it together. Some of the guys said they had never had a prayer group in any of their dorms and were glad I had called us brothers together. We shared praises and prayed for about fifteen minutes. I was blessed to see the guys show up that did. I 'm hoping each of us can hold each other up and influence the drom for Christ.
I've been moved again. This time it was in the process of converting my dorm into a kitchen workers' dorm. I guess they're grouping them together to make it easier to call them to work. Eighteen of twenty-eight guys were moved out and eight of those that stayed are janitors for the dorm. Quite a turnover.
I was moved down the hallway to a dorm with two of four showers that work, one of five sinks that work, a water fountain that doesn't have water, and no hot water pot to get hot water for cooking. I only know two of the guys that were in here when I arrived and, as far as I know, none of these guys are fellow Christians.
Added to the unfortunate circumstances are the guys who beat and rap all night long. In my last dorm I stayed up all night because it was quiet and a perfect time to read. The noise here makes it tough to stay focused on the page. I'm looking forward to a swift move out of this dorm or these guys to stay quiet and go to sleep. I would prefer the former.
I had a great visit today. Both my mom and C. came to see me. It was the first time I've seen C. since we split and my mom for almost a month.
First I heard from my mom about the family trip to New Mexico. Sounded like lots of fun and I really wish I could have been able to go with them. Hopefully when I get out I'll be able to travel with them and just have a good time as family again.
After thirty minutes my mom went to wait outside while I talked with C. It was a lot less awkward than it could have been and reassuring to see that our friendship is still very much intact.
C. and I have had very different experiences this summer but i can tell that God is working in and through us. Two of her friends have come to know Christ through her influence and I have started a couple of guys headed that direction. I hope to see God's kingdom increase by many more as His actions through us are passed on by the people we share with.
I must be doing something right around here because the guards don't seem to be leaving me alone.
Today, on the way to recreation, I was talking with the guy in front of me about traveling to Africa and the malaria medication I had to take. As I passed one of the sergeants, he (the guard) asked me to come back to him. When I went closer to him he told me "Bye."
I didn't know why he wanted me to go back to my dorm so I asked him.
"You can't talk in the hallway. I've been telling you guys the past three days. Bye," he responded.
I hadn't been to recreation since he started and had never been told to stop talking in the hallway. But this sergeant, of all the sergeants, will not allow you to talk with him, and he yells at you if you try. I decided to just return to the dorm and not press the issue.
When I got to the dorm I found that the rules state "offenders will not talk loudly or engage in horseplay" while in the halls. I had been talking in a normal conversational voice and not engaging in horseplay. If the rule was changed, they are required to post the changes in the dorm. No such notice was to be found. So I wrote another grievance.
I don't like people who abuse their authority and this is just one minor example of many instances where abuse has occurred. I just hope that the grievances get something done instead of exacerbating the problem.
*
The following is a grievance I have filed with the administration of the prison unit where I am detained. I have also mailed a copy of this grievance to my family as a record of these events, especially in the event that there are negative repercussions against me from the prison guards as a result of my complaint. For the sake of privacy, names of guards and other inmates have not been used.
July 23, 2008
When I was waiting in line to leave the chow hall today between 6:30 and 6:45, Officer S. told everyone to move over against the wall. As everyone moved over, the guy behind me said something. I don't know his name or what he said, but people call him O____. Ms. S. (the guard) looked at me and said "What did you say?"
I replied " I didn't say anything."
She said, "Come our here (into the hallway) and tell me what you said."
I repeated my previous statement and moved out the door into the hallway without any threatening movements or words. As I came out the door, Officer G. came running up and told me to put my hands behind my back to be handcuffed. I complied and, as I turned around, I told O____, "You shouldn't let me take the fall for this."
O___ then raised his arms and said, "It was me. I said it. He didn't do anything."
Ms. S. yelled, "I don't care if he did it or not! He gave me a mean look!"
Then Mr. G.(the other officer) and I walked to cell block where I was put in a holding cell. The other guards in the hallway at the time were Captain M. and Officers S. and T.
When I was released from holding at around 7:45 to go back to my dorm, Ms. T. called me aside and said, "They did you wrong. I saw that. You did nothing wrong."
I agreed and went back to my dorm.
Around 9:30 I asked Ms. T if she would be a witness if I wrote a grievance. She said no because it would make the problem bigger. She also tried to dissuade me from writing a grievance, saying that Ms. S. would get a copy of what I had written and probably retaliate somehow. As we were talking, Ms. S. walked up and asked me to turn around while she said or signaled something to Ms. T. Ms. S. then asked me to come down the hall. She said she wanted to talk to me. I followed her to the area in front of the commissary window and stopped when she told me to stand against the wall. Then she stared at me for several seconds. I was smiling because I was nervous and said, "Everything's fine and I'm cool if you want to apologize."
She yelled," You cocky motherfucker! You better get your ass down the hallway before I really cuss you out!"
At this time, Officers S.and P. were in the hallway.
At no point did I raise my voice to say anything disrespectful, yet Ms. S. put me in holding for over an hour and cussed at me in blatant disrespect. I have witnessed Ms. S. overreact with disrespect towards other inmates who have done no wrong. It seems to be a pattern that I don't think is professional. I have always been told, "If you give respect, you get respect." I have given respect to each guard working at this unit and I don't think that deserves disrespect from Ms. S. or anyone else.
I would like a personal apology from Ms. S., either verbal or written. I would like officers to be reminded that not all offenders should be treated with disrespect, but to assume respect first. I would like officers to be reminded that acting as an honest witness may make problems worse short-term, but will make for a better environment for officers and inmates alike in the long term.
Hooray!!! We finally have real AC!
The banging around in the air ducts woke me up this morning when the maintenance guys were fixing the duct fans. The noise carries quite well and comes out right over my head. Fortunately the chilled air also comes out over my head and the vent is blowing forcefully.
The temperature is now a very enjoyable 70ish degrees. I often hide under my blanket at night and hold it close. Whenever I am doing anything on my bunk I keep my shirt on, instead of only wearing shorts, and keep a weight on my loose papers to keep them from blowing away. It's a little chilly but far better that the previously unbearable heat.
Boy, this system is hard to deal with. Here is the story of how I got my visitation list changed.
About a month ago my mom asked if I could change my visitation list in anticipation of different friends and family coming to see me. For two weeks I couldn't get a form to change the list, even after sending requests to the administration. The hallways are supposed to have their own supply of each form an inmate might need.
Once I finally received my form, filled it out, and sent it in, I got it back the same day with an explanation that I couldn't change my list until September because I had changed it in March and have to wait six months to make another change. I know I have to wait six months between amendments to my list, but I am also sure I didn't make any changes in March. I haven't changed my list since the day I set foot in TDCJ. The March date was when I showed up at this unit.
Sure that something was amiss, I sent requests to the warden classification department to check into it. My reply came from classification a few days later
and said there was an error (no kidding!) and to resubmit my request form. I still hadn't received as answer from the warden two weeks later.
After resubmitting my form, I got it back with the same rejection as before, this time highlighted to make sure I go the message. Now, you must understand that the form went to the exact same lady in classification who told me in her reply to my request that there was an error. Did she forget? To find out, I sent the form and replied-to request taped together.
I just today received an affirmative notification that changes had been made. Oh, the hoops to jump through and seemingly endless circles to run. To top it all off, the air-conditioning on my wing has broken down - yet again! What next?
